Update..

Well i can drive now, been through the Charlotte heat and humidity, eaten as many pretzels as my stomache can hold, met a few cool friends, have my regular crazy (only in America Type) shows that i tune into every week or so, picked up a few Americanisms, drank as much refill sodas as possible... now what???

Well, i have started my studies and settling down a bit in the sense of a routine and regularity. Its been really great and i never knew how much i have missed being intellectually stimulated. I guess the human brain was not meant to live by fun and sun alone....

I am on the hunt for a job, and since the winter has settled in, it seems a little bit hard to find. Nevertheless, I press on...

Looking back to the beginning of my blog - i sit here and take Reconnaissance of what i set out to achieve from an inward perspective...

Intimacy with myself, with this world, the intimacy that touches the sacred in all that is life. This experience in the USA has been really unspeakably amazing and at the same time extremely challenging to my fundamental comfort zone.

This ache and longing to be greater and larger than my own heart and soul , this longing is the thread that guides me back through the labyrinth of compromises i have made, back to my soul's desires. I was afraid of what those desires would ask of me.. the desire to come here has asked me to sell it all, leave family and friends, comfort and a good life behind me to pursue a dream that i was not sure when realised would be what i expected...

But i realised that if we are not consumed by the transforming fire of our desires, it becomes a day dream.. something we sit and say "one day.. i will".. and yet we never do.. So i take the risks that come with that.

And i must say - It was not and is not easy at all. Wisdom is often born in the shadows of pain and trouble.. and in this we need to be fully absorbed in order to have the WHOLE experience.

Now i stand on the brink of the experience itself ending and "reality" beginning... i ask myself - what now? is this where i want to make a life? do i now want to chase yet another experience or do i just prod along as i currently am??

Something to think about. And yet nothing to meditate on.. but to live everyday with gratitude, with thanksgiving that i have the opportunity to be here, the luxury to choose my life , my dreams and see them realise.