10/21/08

Tonight I am sitting in my apartment, watching my turtle dig through the pebbles in his small tank, looking for more food.. lightning and thunder outside, black clouds overhead. I ordered some Chinese food and decided to watch some tele, exercise and then eat. One of the rare occasions I take the time to do nothing.

I open up my fortune cookie which came with my order- I decide to eat it, though I am already full from my Prawn Chow Fun... The fortune says: "Your life does not get better by chance.. it gets better by change.." That made me smile.

Just today as I walked to work, I got some thoughts brewing in my mind about starting another book.. (and finishing it this time!) And it correlates to my fortune cookie. It has been a long time since I have had no change in my life, it seems almost every week there is a major event whether it be within my work, relationships or just life in general.. it is as if my life at this age is on the cusp of molding me for the next big thing... It is quite exciting..

There are so many things I want to do. As I mentioned before: When I was about 19, I had a "list" a set of things that I wanted to do and by the age of 30 - I had done them all - every one. When I turned 30 - and have done all those things, I was left stumped for what else I wanted to do:

Here is some of what was on my list that I have done:

1. Travel as much as possible (Main destinations: Italy, London, New York, Hong Kong and Paris) - I wanted to celebrate my 30th Birthday on a gondola in Venice with champagne in my hand.. :-) That was awesome.
2. Mould someone's life by either fostering, educating or giving a child an awesome opportunity at a better life or better education.
3. Watch the sunset while flying in the cockpit of a Boeing 747 . That was on my trip to Australia.

4. Be able to take a year off and dedicate my life to my community for the entire year - feeding, clothing and educating people , holding dying babies, listening to abandoned grandmothers talk about their lives...
5. Own a house – mortgage free
6. Live in another country for a Year. (My heart wanted Los Angeles, USA) But I was prepared to take whatever I got. I got Paris first and now Denver, USA – not a bad deal.
7. Drive 5 super cars - Fast, exotic, expensive...
8. Meet all the celebrities I look up to. Meet all the Formula 1 racing drivers. (Lewis Hamilton - I don’t care if you ARE dating a pussy-cat doll.. and I don’t care that you drive for McLaren.. you can’t hide forever!!!!!)
9. Meet Nelson Mandela
10. Own my own business
11. Have my poems published
12. Walk on the wings of an airplane (not in flight!)
13. Watch the launch of a space shuttle
14. Star in a commercial / do some modeling
15. Ride a camel in the desert
16. Be someone’s mentor
17. Play the guitar (ok.. that didn’t last more than 2 months! But I tried!)
18. Own one very expensive, meaningless accessory (I won’t say!)
19. Own my own car – debt free. Have my own car built and help in the design
20. Learn to shoot a firearm
21. Give a speech that left an audience in awe. I still have the tape :-) thanks Corne.

I won’t go on and on.. But those are some examples of what stirred my soul… dreams that have fully and wonderfully been accomplished.. leaving me utterly happy and fulfilled.

Currently, I am learning to speak French and Spanish. It is difficult because I have Spanish friends here, but not alot of French ones, thankfully I train our office in Paris on some of our IT systems... so I can use it to a minimal degree.

My work has kept me so busy that I am without enough time to really fit in anything other than minor social activities. I decided to start a new interest every month and commit to it and see it through in order to expand myself. But I started learning some of the technical facets of my job.. not because I need it for the function that I fulfill, but to have a holistic understanding of things... man - it is really hard. I do not have a technically shaped mind.. I can understand how the engine of a car works (just about).. but try to tell me about servers and IT garble.. it is really hard - but it's challenging and I long to learn.
So I am studying and trying to wrap my head around all things IT!

I also decided to learn the spirituality of a completely different culture. And my choice of people / culture is the Japanese. I have a few Colleagues from our Japan office out here which I have been speaking with and after my short few hours in the Tokyo airport, I found myself in-love with Japanese.. I want to learn what stirs them as a people spiritually, culturally.. where their core and beliefs come from. My next goal on that note, is to visit Tokyo - work in the office for a week and vacation and visit. I hope I can do it really soon.

I struggled to come up with a new list… But everything I endeavour to do with my life revolves around mentoring, teaching and getting right down to people's pain and helping them achieve great things.

I want to help young women see the beauty in their bodies, in their minds, in their souls, I want to teach people how to touch their own passion, how to inspire others’ passion and how to live with conviction being true to their own beauty and own heart. I want to show every woman that whether you are a medical doctor, a secretary, a mother, a private detective, an actor, a world traveler, a wife of a rich man or an astronought.. you can be beautiful, you can be sexy and you can be grounded, full of intelligence, mind and body hard at work… making a difference and inspiring people for your whole life.. not just at one time….

Your passion won’t always turn into easy dollars for you.. but that doesn’t mean you can’t work at something you love AND have other passions that fulfill every side of you. I want to help every woman reach inside her and see who has been hiding in there.. find all the hidden dimensions of herself and display it to the world.. Because, face it.. reality is this.. not every artist who is a single mother of 3 children for example, will be able to abondon things to put her time into the pursuit of her art as her bread….

But I want to inspire women that they CAN do it all and have it all.. It's is not about a tireless effort to drag yourself through life to look decent and feed your family.. It is about putting your passions into action in the smallest measures and see them grow... love where you are at.. find your inner core and the loves that take your soul to new places.. right where you live and see your destiny and passion unfold in all the ordinary things you do and watch yourself become extraordinary.

You don’t have to just stick with the job because it feeds the kids… you can feed the kids, have a job you like even if it is not the driving force of your heart at that moment, you can still find fulfilment while you unfold. Meet and devote yourself to your man with passion and devotion and you can inspire the world and you can live realistically, artistically, fruitfully, spiritually, touch people, raise your family.. all the while working on the things that encapsulates what you were created for… it takes many forms..

Take your heart and your reality and live it all fully and unconditionally all at the same time and you CAN do it all while being true to your convictions and faith and looking fabulous and sexy! YES!!! It is possible.

Here are some things.. that I have on my current list in the back of my mind:



1. Create my own website (come on.. I work for a Publishing / design company!!!)
2. Be able to eventually speak and use 7 languages (In time)
3. Take my mum on a trip around the world
4. Take a year off (again) and follow the F1 circuit.. sunbathe on a yacht in Monte Carlo
5. Set a foot on each of the 7 continents (Almost there!!)
6. Ride an elephant
7. Hold a baby panda in my arms
8. Learn to dance the rumba with a professional dancer and do it in front of everyone who knows me!
9. Write an amazing book, have it published and read reviews about it
10. Live in Barcelona for a few months
11. Run or assist someone in running a business
12. Taking up a martial art
13. Write a song that someone actually puts music to and sings
14. Help someone raise a child
15. Climb the pyramids and write my name in the sand
16. Do a professional photo shoot on the great wall of China
17. Give someone the opportunity to fulfill a dream.. a chance they never had and never believe they could have.. make it possible and happen for them and watch them enjoy their dream come true!
18. Own every one of the designer bags I love! I only have 3 grrrr
19. Have dinner with Michael Schumacher (Is this list starting to sound fantastical now??)
20. Go for cooking lessons ( I KNOW how to cook.. I want to learn how to be an amazing cook!)

21. Teach English
22. Audition for a James bond role (Not to be the “bond girl.. to BE James Bond!!) LOLOLOLOL

23. Go to Jordan and see what women there go through. I had a small taste of the kind of life a Muslim woman endures– not from school, but when I was in Dubai.. because I look a lot like a local woman there, rather than a tourist.. I was treated like a local woman.. it was not a pleasant experience.
24. Have the choice to not work a full time job. Make passive income ($$) and go around the world (even if it's only MY world) helping people find their dreams..
25. Walk barefoot in the moonlight on a beach in Hawaii.
26. Have an original samurai sword made for me in Japan and ship it home, have on the mantle it in my house…
27. Go on a spending spree in Harrods.. ok.. this will require A LOT of number 24.
28. Fall in love with abandon and without condition
29. Drive a Bugatti Veyron at 268miles per hour on the Autobahn
30. Obtain a Masters degree in Communication.

Well, that is all for now – it seems a shame that I only have 30 things on that list.. but I guess all the rest revolve around the idea of mentoring and helping people ...

And also I can hear you snoring from here!!!! HA HA HA :-)

I do have a few "silly things" I would like to do that is not world-changing.. but some fun activites I would LOVE to do.. that is for next time...