Wow. It really has been a while. So much has happened in the almost two months of blog silence.  Some great, some ok and some pretty nasty-awful!  Where to begin.

Well, In March I was still living the life of leisure.. waking up at 7am - working until 10am and then walking over to the mall - sipping a chai.. laying at the pool, hitting the gym and napping.. pretty nice :) 

The middle of March happened really suddenly. I got another job very quickly after 6 excuriating interviews (not to mention new outfits!) and then boom - I was working two jobs. I thought it would start off pretty mild and be easy to get used to waking up at 5am - and getting done with everything at 8pm... far from it!!!  It started off with such a bang and the standard and expectation of me was SOO high, I felt thrown off kilter. I would get home exhausted and have to finish job number 2, go to the gym at 9pm whip up something to eat and fall asleep.. This went on for about 3 weeks.. Weekends would come and I would savor each minute in the sun and each minute of sleep.

In between all of that - I got whacked with financial expenses which ate into almost all my savings, causing me to start from scratch (thank God the job came just in time!!!).  Medical bills started pouring in and so on... I started having eye problems and had to wear glasses most days ugh. You know how it always goes!! RAIN RAIN RAIN.

Well, now its 7 weeks later and I am comfortable at work.. I already hung out with a bunch of the girls, been teased by the Subaru guys about the car I drive... and so my life and routine is stablilizing.  Work is GREAT - I LOVE my job!!!!  The nice part - I am fully into my gym routine.. Getting stronger and healthier by the day and I now don't feel as if all my free time is being sucked into oblivion. I feel as if I am starting to make a difference and SLOWLY the money is starting to turn itself around. I have been doing so many nice social things too. Wine night on Tuesdays, seeing bunnies in the Garden.. Watching R8's drive past while eating frozen yogurt in the sun.. ahh life is good.

Some of the nasty-awful. (well, some more! LOL)

This past weekend a very dear friend of mine passed away.. It was really heart wrenching and also.. not being able to reach out across the oceans.. it was a tough weekend. I felt so emptied out.. so much grief in my heart - yet.. I know she was suffering for so long..

However... I would not be true to myself if I had to stay in the land of sad or negative.. So, I have to celebrate a life sadly taken too soon.. Nads.. I will never forget you my beautiful, Amazing friend.. may you rest in eternal peace and the life and legacy you left behind will live on forever.. In my heart you will always be - I love you friend. Here is to us: "white wine"..

So - I have a nice plan mapped out.. with my jobs well in tact for the moment.. I have to work hard and stay focussed and in a matter of time.. things will pan out nicely - I have faith.. I believe it.. it will happen.. By June / July -  my life will change dramatically (watch this space) I am so excited!

I hope to get a chance to go home this year for Christmas.. I miss my family and the sanity of Africa.  I miss the wild rugged naturalness of my beloved home.  I love my chosen home for many reasons.. but South Africa will always be my true home.

In this last month, I have learned a few very VERY important lessons..

1. Let go of the things that hold you down.. That is not an epiphony.. it just came into reality for me when I realized that baggage really just keeps you back from fulfilling your potential. Your life is YOUR life.. and if you just leave it up to everyone and everything else to determine or just for time to go by - you will wake up one day with so much regret and waste.. EAT.. PRAY.. LOVE.

2. I learnt who my true friends are.  I used to hold on for dear life to everyone who I had called friend and given my heart to...even when they treated me like sh**t, I'd always be on their side.. have their backs... but in this past year - I have let go of my grip ... and what do you know no one reached back... except a select few.. and it was those few consistently... the people who love you will love you -it doesn't mean you have to talk every day or every month.. but when they NEVER talk to you... maybe that is a hint.

3. I also learnt that inspiration cannot be manufactured and it comes from the most uncanny places.. I have this one friend who the moment they get on the phone.. I smile for days after.. regardless of the content of the conversation.. and not only smile.. feel like the world is mine for the taking. (NO ONE ASK ME WHO OK!!! It's not your business lol)

I have withdrawn from alot of the Facebook drama.. and I just watch and read.. I don't share my life too much on there anymore and it has been refreshing and liberating.

I haven't picked up writing my book yet - but I don't regret it at the moment.. I wanted to have my big dog on the beach of San Diego by now.. But I am seeing that the path life is painting for me is even better than the one I envisioned.. It's forming such an exciting, inspiring and selfless journey for me.. that it makes me want to hug the world! I am happy - yet it's hard.. and I wouldn't have it any other way.. Many days I long to escape to an easier existence.. but most days - I am just grateful because of faith and destiny and the blessing which I marvel at in my life...

and I see it.. I get it.. I GET IT.