..Old emails...

Firstly, I must say being at the Dream Center has completely just challenged me - I started a drive this weekend with our Church to collect supplies for kids who are leaving the foster care system.  It's been very exciting and just knowing what a difference it will make to a young person, gives me endless joy!


Ok - so today I decided to clear out all my emails and I found some old archived emails and read through some of them.  Some made me laugh.  Isn't it funny how people say things and in those moments they sound so important and then years later, you realize they were just being utterly foolish (I am sure if they had to re-read their own words, they would be embrassed!) - I guess the same can be said of all of us - I read some of the fiery emails I have sent or some of the lame ones.. haha


People think they know you.. and sometimes they mouth off about their knowlegde of you, judge you and blame you.. and then years later - well, all I can say is.. look at where they are.. your life will always speak for what is true :)


My desultory ramblings for the day.

6 year Anniversary

Wow – is it really?? Today exactly 6 years ago I landed on American soil.  What was meant to be a 1 year adventure, turned into a 6 year saga!!

 So many adventures ßà so many trials. But what a journey!

What is crazy is – I have been blogging for 6 years as well!! I wonder if I am the record holder for 6 years of consistent blogging.. hmmm. I think last year I had the longest hiatus from my blog which lasted about 5 months.  Other than that, I have been rocking it for 6 years!

All I can think of today is how blessed I have been.  In South Africa in some ways my life was simpler – definitely more filled with friendships and family.  But in America, life is easier from a material point of view.    All my high school friends will attest to the fact that I talked ad nauseum all through high school about me living in America someday – have you ever come face to face with your dream and wondered: “what now?”  
But here I am. 
Loving it.

The Land of Opportunity

Yesterday I took my fancy new camera to the “Dream Center” in downtown Phoenix.  A local radio station was doing a volunteer run, packing kits for girls who have been rescued from Human Trafficking.  Ever since I heard what a huge problem it is here in Phoenix, I started getting the desire to be involved.  To be involved is just amazing – there is just so much work to be done, the need is great and to see these girls rehabilitated just makes my heart glad.  I can’t rid the world of every injustice much as it infuriates me, like a lot of you.. But I can do what I can do.  It was great – I talked to a few people and didn’t take pictures because there was just no time – I was more interested in being there than snapping it.  Next time!

It is so strange integrating yourself into a new culture. A lot of people hold on with vehement tenacity to their culture, and some just let it go for ease of integration.  Me, on the other hand, I have held on to a lot.  I don’t go to South African functions, eat only South African food etc.. but I do try to find bits and pieces of home.  The parts of my culture that I hold on to is how I was brought up.  The manners, the lessons and the truths I was taught.  Other than a few “isms” I haven’t really adopted a lot of American culture / way of speaking. Sometimes at the office I will change a word in order for people to understand me better.   The sense of humor here is the biggest difference.  Everything is taken very literally – so one has to be careful!

So an “American Story” Continues. Will I live here forever? Perhaps not.. maybe another 8 years then maybe it will be time for Europe. Who knows!

Life’s adventure continues.

Happy Anniversary to me and America for having me!

In Other news..

My Turtle is getting way too big for his tank... and I haven't gotten up the courage to spend $150 on a new Tank (much less deciding where to put it) So, I let him have a swim in the bath :D  funny - he didnt like it much.  (Those things that look like droppings are actuallys pebbles..)
and
YES! I cleaned the bath quite thoroughly after! heehee


aww BIG T!

My .. March .. Madness...

I exited February with an amazing explorative weekend to The Mission Inn. It was refreshing and healing in many ways. I just needed to marvel at something.  One does not realize how frustrating being ill can be until you are there and healing just seems so far from you.  I relaxed that weekend, smiled and had a good time.   As I was about to board the plane homeward bound, I started getting one of those annoying eye-twitches.  I thought nothing of it, as you do, and went on my way ready to face work, the world and everything that comes along.  But I was not ready for what came…

The 3 weeks that followed were absolute hell.  I started getting muscle cramps and spasms, so bad in my face and body that I could not sleep or function, I sat  on Google day in and day out trying to “diagnose” myself – which made everything worse.. My hair started falling out, got blisters on my mouth that would not heal for 15 days – everything just seemed SO out of the blue crazy. I cried, I went to back to my dr. twice, stressed, frustrated and sleep deprived.. All my tests were “normal”. I even went for a brain scan! Everything came back “normal”.  After another week, I returned to my Dr.  That day he looked me squarely in the eye and said: “Delise you need to stop your stressing. You are a young, healthy woman, you have NO diseases there is NOTHING wrong with you! You are so stressed out and you need to get on with life and relax”. (That is the short version!)  I went away feeling rather annoyed and also a little gobsmacked.  Was he right?  I wasn’t sure – I wasn’t “consciously” stressed out.   I just knew how I felt and that this wasn’t “NORMAL”.   That Saturday I went to see a holistic medical specialist.  He took one look at me and said: “Your digestion is causing your body not to hold onto nutrition and that is why everything is off balance” – he did acupuncture on me and gave me some stomach herbs.  Also suggested a few relaxation techniques.  I prayed that night – I went to church as usual…

Backing up for a second:

The Acupuncture

So, the man stuck these tiny needles in my body and played some calming music.   He felt my pulse and told me my body is way out of balance, my heat impulses are out of control (whatever that means) It was strange.. Sensations ran through my body and I could feel my body fighting to relax.   But, I closed my eyes and just tried to not pee in my pants (I had forgotten to go the bathroom beforehand!)  Hours passed (well 20minutes actually!)  The dr. came back & we spoke; he gave me a game plan for the next week and sent me on my way. I felt encouraged.

When I got home – it felt like I had taken a sedative. I was fatigued, sleepy like I have never been before. I went to sleep after church – actually.. now that I think about it à did I sleep in  church?? Oh no – I don’t think I did. LOL.

I woke up Sunday morning feeling SO refreshed. All the spasms were gone for the moment. I looked in the mirror and I saw myself again.  You have to understand – weeks prior all I saw was someone fading away – a shadow of what I recognized as me.  My eyebrows were falling out, hair falling out.. and it was a dark, scary place.  A lot of it was more mental than anything else. But it was my reality.

That Sunday, I felt great for the first time in a month! 

I then went for a B12 shot to help my body get the nutrition it needed while my stomach started to heal and changed my diet, kept a food journal.  When I took my blood tests to the guru guy the following week, he said I should have been on thyroid medication, my regular doctor told me I was in the “normal” range. This dr. says I am WAY over the normal range (hmmm…)!  I haven’t yet started taking the meds, I am giving my body a chance to just rest, heal etc.

Well, by that assessment I had a week of great sleep and a week of feeling so energized and amazing that I didn’t want to go on medication!  But I know the road is still long.. I understand that my body needs to heal and balance..  And I went for another session of acupuncture.

All I can say is.. I have come to realize that there is nothing more important on earth than these 3 things:

Faith, Love and your health.  Really – if you don’t have those.. nothing matters.. NOTHING.

Maybe my body just needed the time, maybe my mind caused it all to happen.. maybe the relaxation helped and maybe it’s a combination of it all.

All I know is – I reached UP and God reached down (albeit unconventionally – some might question) – but whatever people’s opinion might be after reading this:

The HEALER ---> and the <---- hurt  Collided somewhere in this story..

and here I am.

On the road to WHOLENESS after a long suffering journey.

The Mission Inn

I took off for the weekend to California, Riverside to be exact.  After 2 weeks of battling with my health, I just needed a "time-out" - A place to relax, to marvel at something new and to pamper myself.

The weekend was more than I expected, it was like being in a  tucked away village in Spain, far from every day life..  I ate great food, and there was just so much to explore and see, my senses were awakened..

And I felt alive again.

Isn't it funny what being sick does to you? It takes away that feeling of really tasting life with all of yourself. 

I feel better and I am on my way to being as fit and healthy as I can be so that I can continue  this amazing journey that life has me on.