So this had me thinking…

 Albany

I went to a wedding in Albany, NY a few weeks ago. WOW! What fun. It was wonderful to see the changing of the leaves. As you know, I reside in the desert and all we have here is dirt and hot weather!  I played in the leaves, I danced under the grey angry sky and I twirked with a lesbian.

I did get stuck there one night longer, so that was a little stressful. But it was a fun little trip.

I have been working on quite a few projects, spending time with the people in my life and working really hard. I am starting to think of my next vacation and where that may be.. I am a little cash strapped right now, so Paris might have to wait till next year.

I look at my life now and how settled I am, compared to the past.  I guess your life just balances itself out eventually.  Well, and it isn’t so much that I wasn’t settled before, but I feel like my gypsy heart is at a resting place. Don’t mistake being settled for being complacent.

I still have my challenges. My weight has sky rocketed and I find myself in that endless fight to get it down. I am currently at 117lbs.. Which is 17lbs more than I was 3 years ago. Depressing. I write it on here because its sad, and I hope that announcing my defeat to the world might make me more motivated to change it..

So, I was working on a little gift / art project and one of the creative items I was looking for was words.. those cut outs that you can creatively stick on things to make it look cool. I realized that not one store had the word passion!   I saw “Love”, “Romance”, “Cheers” etc.. it had me wondering about this current culture that we live in.. is it just an over sight, a word used only in sexual context or is it that our generation really don’t have or live with passion?

I love the word ‘passion’ – I think people use it flippantly or sexually. Ofcouse it DOES have that connotation. But to me, I have always been intrigued by  and drawn to people who do things with passion or who display an unwavering conviction and excitement for whatever it is they do.  I find it very interesting that the word actually comes from the Latin word “pati” – which means to ‘Suffer”.. it’s a strong aching for something, a painful forceful, volcanic need for something or someone.

I guess I have always written my life story on the fiery pages of pain, aching, conviction, ardent, boundless, limitless, powerful, furious forces of passion…

I don’t know –call me crazy, but why would you want to live any other way??

So, I have been having a go at taking care of a dog.  Remember how I have always wanted  a St. Bernard.. and how I wanted to be Heidi like my whole life – even though I have had a terrifying fear of dogs my whole life lol – yep ever the Condondrum -   Well, this dog is about that size. Very well trained.  But I think I have been cured of wanted a big dog. No scratch that.. I have been cured of ever wanting a dog.. I will go on dreaming I can float on clouds and own a fluffer J