This is my life and oh! How things have changed J

Rough Summary of my Routine:

Wake up around 6:30am, work out at home.  Make lunches if necessary. Get ready for work.

My work day is great, busy but not super slammed, So, I try to find time at lunch / breaks to get a lot of personal errands done. I try to maximize where possible every minute I can.

Anything from shoe repairs, Goodwill runs to post office drop offs etc.

In between working, and errands, I try to read at least one book a day. My specialty is reading Celebrity Biographies and memoirs. I read on my phone, while I am working, or taking a break outside

When I get home, I tidy up a bit and then head to Zumba.

After Zumba, I have dinner with the family, then I do the real clean up. I don’t cook, thankfully. I used to love cooking, but after living alone for a while, I got over it and just started eating out. And now, thankfully, I have someone who loves to cook. Score.

After dinner and putting the kids to bed, I get on line for a little bit to do my online counseling with the Group from 7 Cups of Tea, while I am waiting for people to chat, I study my course and read some more.

After that, I am pretty wiped out. 

I sit outside on the patio with my Boo and a glass of wine, and we catch up about our day, compare the Pokémon we caught and just have a laugh together.

I take about 30 minutes to check work emails before having a shower. Only then do I truly put my feet up and watch whatever show I am interested in at that moment.

10:30pm is about the time I am ready for bed and 11pm fast asleep.

Every day is different though. And now that the weather is cooler I take this guy for a walk every day :) we love our walks.

I try to get in some volunteer work outside of 7 cups of tea “Counseling”. I feel like my calling is to network with key people and make connections that would otherwise be impossible. 

I spend a lot of time finding ways to connect people and help people’s career paths.

First

7 Cups of Tea

Well, a couple who frequently encountered troubled youth started this website. Realizing that there are some young folk out there who will never get to a counselor chair for whatever reason. And have very little respect for Adults anyway.  But, what they will do, is Bitch online to everyone who will lend an ear. So, they decided to be the “ear” and inadvertently help them along the way. So, after you do some training online, you can become one of these people who help. Really. I use the word “Counselor” loosely.  I have come to realize that a lot of these people online are very lonely and grieving in some way or another. Mostly relationship trouble and it is nice to just have someone to talk to and vent to.  I love being able to give them advice without being preachy, and it seems to help. How far reaching it goes, I don’t know. But I figure any positive nugget you can put out in the universe must be worth something. Right?

Connecting

In addition to traditional types of philanthropy and the 7 Cups of Tea thing, I have discovered that I have a knack for connecting people with other people who will be helpful on their career path or just in life in general.

I have always kept every connection alive that I have made with people. This takes a lot of effort.  All the famous people, Government people etc, I have made it my mission to contact them regularly in a non-bothersome way. The result is that I am still great friends with people from all industries.

Through Facebook, I have also kept in touch with all my school, college and old work friends, Thus, my network became like an army of “people I know” across continents, careers and callings.

 And Like a spider spinning a web, I started introductions.  I have always remained the ‘Ghost’ though, in the back ground. I have no desire for fame or to be known. I am very political and diplomatic about how I connect people, so that the Celebs for instance, all trust me and feel confident, I would never betray them, not talk to the media or introduce them to anyone insane!

Just recently. I reconnected with a friend whom I was in College with. He had won the Nelson Mandela Scholarship to go Study at Cambridge University – can you believe that! . .  After graduating, he now runs a small school in Thailand and I connected him with 2 of my Thai friends, who now help him run the school. The two said friends are business owners and they were looking for such a long time to get something like this up and running. And Voila!

I am like the guy on “Better Call Saul” But in a good way!  When people tell me their stories.. my first response is “I know a guy”… ha ha

Another connection was more amazing; I will leave that story for its own blog as it is currently unfolding.

One of my friends have recently likened me to “Donna, from the show “Suits”.  The Assistant who has all the connections and knows all the gossip and drama!

And More

I also help people proof movie scripts, and books.  Like I don’t have my own bad book to write and proof read – I just love it! In between that I try to nurture my relationships by calling friends and my family who do not live close by, meeting with them for coffee or sending voice notes and emails.  I used to help make movies, but these days, time just does not allow me to indulge in that anymore.

I get invited to a lot of get togethers, most of which I decline. We always have so much going on and the juggle gets too much, so the social aspect with friends kinda must take a back seat.  But I do go on the occasional girl’s bender, or just go hiking.

I find time to sit in silence

I try to find time to pray and read my bible. Sometimes I will listen to sermons while I am working on my boss’s schedule. It is like listening to music. I can multitask. I use every minute in my car to either pray, make calls or something. I never just drive. Well, sometimes I use this time for the silence!

I am often writing legal letters for whatever legal war we are in or some family schedule that needs to get done. I am the family organizer and people always lean on me because I can read and write in a jiffy.

The kids have a crazy schedule. They do Fly-ball on Sundays (which I do not attend). They train therapy dogs. They have endless birthday party invites.   Most of the time we drop them off and stay for a quick chat, make sure the parents aren’t batshit crazy.. and then leave to breathe for a while, somewhere.

Then there is homework, assignments and projects. This is daily, weekly and even on the weekends.

Of course carving out time to just laugh together, play games have fun. Teaching kid’s new things is fine and exciting and also exhausting.

I go to movies every other week. It sucks to be involved with movies but not be in the know about wha

t is currently on the circuit and being talked about. I try to keep an ear on the gossip too, just in case it comes up in conversation. I like to be a person who knows a little about a lot of things. Makes for good surprised looks and huge (sometimes heated) conversations.

Part of my personality also NEEDS to constantly try something new and adventurous. I am always online looking for something for me and Robert to do together. Whether it is shooting guns, tearing through the desert or watching a Burlesque show – our dates nights are far from dinner and a movie!

Some Friday nights we go to Drag racing. Indulge the petrol head in me.

The Gemini gypsy in me MUST see and experience EVERYTHING.

So, as you can see the Supercharged life I live doesn’t always afford me the luxury to travel the world as much as before, But, if anyone knows me, they would know that nothing will ever stop me from traveling. So, I have plans in the works for next year.

My mom and brother arrive in about 2 weeks and I can hardly wait to get some South Africa back in me!

November 9th, 2016

The One with the American President

I think it is fitting since today is election day in the United States of America, to write about the one time when I met an American President.

Today is a momentous day in American History. Donald Trump was just elected President of the USA> Who would ever have imagined that? Nevertheless, Democracy reigns and the people have spoken. There is a lot of upset and rage over it, and who knows what will happen next. The market has crashed, and there are a lot of inadvertent knee-jerk reactions happening in society.

However, I am very optimistic about the future. There is so much more to what it means to have a competely new Party take over the Government, than just one face.. But I am not well versed enough to make an opinion on that, really.  Politics aside.

The last few months since my engagement. I have been SO busy. Planning a backyard wedding is no easy task, even in its pure simplicity, there are just so many details to take care of.

Then there is the matter of the baby mama drama. I have had my fill of being involved with this. However, I keep thinking back to what Pastor Luke has been teaching us about "Greater things" And being Great for God.  Doing what is right even when there is NOTHING in it for you.

Someone once told me, a Step-parent takes on all the responsibility and gets none of the reward... In the beginning, it was ok. The children's mother wasn't in the picture. While this is not ideal for the kids, it made life a little simpler.  Definitely NOT easier, since I had to pick up all the slack all the time with no break.  Now that she is back, the kids are in that awkward insecurity phase-  emotions are high at home and it is weekly damage control, since they come back all confused and hurt each week... now past feelings of emptiness by her absence are replaced by many questions, uncertainty and ofcourse, they do not know their mother..  only their distant memories of her - and getting to know her is exciting and new - like seeing the Favorite Aunt you used to love .. but also very hard on them.  But, I keep reminding myself... I am not doing this for me, or for a reward. Family is everything. I keep plowing on! I keep doing my best!~

Back to my story:

It was early 2000's - I used to travel out to the USA quite a lot before I moved here. Every trip fueled my desire to live here.  This particular trip I was in Washington DC.   I was invited to a Political Event. Politician friends who were going to this posh charity event at the time, insisted we join them.  I had nothing to wear. This was not a political Rally or something -  it was a very fancy dinner.. with the President of the United States of Freaking America! As in POTUS~

So, I took to Macy's, splashed out $500 of my holiday funds on a dress and a coat, and got all did up! (remember I was shopping in South African Currency, this this was A LOT of money)

That night, I was feeling very excited and very nervous about this event. After a few short instructions, Hors d'oeuvres and speeches, we started to mingle. Far in one corner of the crowded room of strangers, there he was. Soft, silver hair and soft blues eyes.  Smiling and nodding his head at various people POTUS~

Like I have said many times, it depends on the person or situation for me to become Star Struck.But I think being in the presence of who some people call "The most powerful man on earth" .. was just exhilarating.  I mean,  I had not yet met Madiba at that point.. so, I didn't really get to be in the presence of such an iconic political figure.

Finally, it was our turn to make small talk with POTUS... and wouldn't you know it. Hand shake and a smile. I didn't know or realize how tall he really was. Standing about 6"2 towering over me, with a very charming, polite side-ways smile, he leaned down to shake my hand.   He looked genuinely interested in people.  Maybe years of practice and he was secretly thinking about something random, but it seemed legit.

The guy we went with, started right into Political talk, while I stood there like a blitering idiot smiling, staring. Then all of a sudden, POTUS looked down at me, and said, "Hey Beautiful young lady, so you are from South Africa, what a great country".   I didn't hear any introduction about South Africa.. but I didnt really care.  Maybe I passed out. No I didnt   -  I just giggled. (i did that alot back when I was 20's, like a little kid).  I think I just said thank you. Actually,  to my total embarrassment, I am pretty sure I said: "Thank you, Your Honor". He laughed. He was looking at me still while talking with folded arms, listening to our group conversation, and just for a minute, he cracked me a very, very flirtatious smile and had a strange look in his eye. Or maybe it was indigestion. I don't know.

Again, he asked what I did for a living, I beamed as I said: "At this time, I am doing Social work" - this peaked his interest and had my political friends looking really irritated and impatient that POTUS seemed more interested in me, than in political talk  They started looking around the room restlessly to find other Politicians whose ear needed to be bent.. I just talked a little. He [POTUS] had to lean down to hear me as my accent and soft voice was hard to hear in the room buzzing with conversation.  Mid-sentence, a man's voice came on over a speak announcing some or other activity was about to begin. POTUS touched the side of my arm and said, "nice talking to you young lady.  Folks,  keep up the great work"   he said as he nodded approvingly to the rest of our group. For a brief second he turned back and left another look in my direction. Yeah - maybe I dreamed it all up - I don't know!

His security detail, who by now were keeping a much closer eye on me.. left after him like an army ensuring his safety back to his table.

I just stood there, sighing, smiling, red faced.

This was awesome.  We went to our seats, and I sat with my head leaning on one of my hands with a sheepish, crush-like grin all over my face for the rest of the night. I was in love. Well, you know what I mean!

“Coopers Town”

I very recently reconnected with a childhood friend of mine.   We were best friends since the age of hmm... maybe 6 and it continued until I was around 21 – we drifted apart and thanks to Facebook reconnected and now being back in each other’s’ lives like no time had passed at all. Doing life together. So amazing!

Everyday we send each other Whatsapp voice notes and talk about our day and just like friends do – chat with each other, help, advice and prayer. Anyway, I was sending her one of my voice notes and telling her about the work I did with Alice Cooper and our church here in Phoenix and it jogged a fun memory.

When I first joined Phoenix First Assembly (Now, Dream City Church) – I discovered that Alice Copper and his wife. Sheryl belonged to the church and have a huge Youth outreach program.  This program helps Teens discover musical talents. They have a place where they can come enjoy music, coffee and food and learn how to Jam. Also, it is like a recreational place to get Teens off the streets and away from drugs and boredom.

So for a time I helped mentor a couple of teens. Which is a huge stretch for me, as I do not like Teenagers at ALL hahahaha

But it was a fun, fulfilling and eye opening experience. Alice is a very down to earth and weird guy!

Adventures

For Robert's Birthday (October 8^th)

 We went on a desert Buggie experience,  we tore through the desert. I was disappointed though; it wasn’t adventurous enough for Robert because our guide was taking it really slow. So, it was a bust – well, I just have to find a better one next time.

Until next post.. 

The one where the bird flew into my head

May, 2013

I had had it with Match.Com by this time. I had gone on about 4 dates. I met one really nice guy named Jesse. We went on about 7 dates.. we got along really well and he was good looking and funny – but for whatever reason, it went nowhere, it kind of went into the boring zone and then he just disappeared.

A few others were completely unremarkable and I had lost all hope in the Internet Dating game.  So, I went onto Christian Mingle. If you ever think Christians cannot be weird. Think again.

So this guy and I start chatting, he was ok looking from his fuzzy profile picture. Nothing amazing. I decided hey let’s bypass the superficial for a minute and see if “ok” was ok – to get some conversation going.

We chatted for a bit and he seemed ok.  After a few chats, we made a date to meet at Tempe Market place – Bar Louie. This was my date place –I would always suggest meeting there. It is very public, close to home and close to the movies, after my date went wrong (and it usually did) I could just go watch a movie and forget the whole thing in a Large popcorn and Big screen entertainment!

As I pull up to the restaurant and park my car, I see he sent another message, I glazed over it quickly in case it was to cancel, but it was a long rant about God knows what. 

So, I go into the restaurant and grab a seat on the patio. Check in on Facebook, text my friend, Nicole, letting her know where I am and sent  her the profile pic of the guy I was meeting. Standard operating procedure in woman dating world. 

The guy walks in – he is about 20 pounds heavier in person, sweating like a pig, I mean sweat circles under his arms, and his shirt is so small the buttons are busting open. Already, I know – no matter what he has to say. There would be NO second date. Sorry. That is just how it is!

I got up and greeted him, he wanted to hug me, but no thanks. He didn’t even smile when he saw me.  The waitress comes over and we order drinks.. STRONG Mojito for me please and I order a small salad. 

The entire time trying to listen to this gross guy waffling on about his ex-wife who left him for some Russian guy.. there was a little string on my tank top that kept bugging me. In between drinks, bites and me pretending to be interested, I pulled and tugged, trying to be inconspicuous.  After about 15 minutes, I realized my tank top had unraveled and I now sat there with a big fat hole under my arm pit!

I turned to look at the damage just in time for the guy to ask me: “Do you speak in tongues?”.   Caight off guard with foot in my mouth, I said yes, why?  And at that moment, a pigeon flying merrily onto the patio flew straight into my head getting its feet tangled in my hair, I was freaking out and laughing at the same time, flailing, my arms around to get rid of it, exposing my torn up tank top. I was a mess!  But somehow the whole thing was so hilarious to me I couldn’t stop laughing. The guy.. he didn’t even crack a smile.

He paid the bill and said, “speaking in tongues is wrong it is from the devil and If we are gonna get married, you cannot speak in tongues”. And I was like NO PROBLEM there! It seemed as if he wanted to get into a theological discussion about speaking in tongues, and though I am always up for a good intellectual Bible debate – this sweaty pig had over stayed his welcome.

I got up, said thank you and started to leave, when he said, so when are we going out again?

All I said was thanks. No. bye. Then he started texting me bible verses and how rude I was for not giving him a second date.

To illustrate how unremarkable this date was – I cannot even remember his name and his phone number is now BLOCKED!

As life prods along…

While I was talking about my weird dates last time, life was moving by fast. There I was having fun, parenting (ish) and just getting the job done, juggling all the things I do – we go hiking up to Fossil Creek and Boom out of the blue – this happens:

I have to say, it seems surreal to be engaged again.  My life has been a whirlwind. An Adventure. I never pictured or could imagine myself without Craig – we seemed like the same person, if that makes sense.

“He's more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” 
― Emily Brontë, Wuthering Heights

But in the end, I guess the time had come to close that chapter - it had been a wonderful time, a good life - a great love but now, I move onto another.

We have a lot of plans in the works – travel plans, life plans. It just seems fitting that I would marry the son of a Pilot – after all the universe would implode if my gypsy soul is not embraced J

Onward to new Chapters. Greater things.

MEMOIR NOTES

Weird Dates – Part 1

The one with the Massage Therapist

So, all these stories are from long ago.  Banked safely into the memoir deposit box of my life and my heart  - for entertainment, fear, laughter, tears and infuriating anger.  Whichever emotions my life stories make you feel - You are welcome! ;')

I had been going on and off for massages with Brett. Really good therapist. During the massages, we had talked and gotten to know each other pretty well.  We quickly became friends, laughed a lot and texted every day.

Then one day during a volunteer run at the Salvation Army, he said he feels connected to me and would I like to go out on a date with him. I was a little skeptical at first, because while I liked him as a friend, and he was definitely good looking, I wasn’t so sure I felt the same kind of connection.

I also figured it might be slightly awkward to say no and then show up for my next massage! #socialpolitics

So here was his idea: Meet him up in Cave Creek. He was house sitting for his parents, we would go to a Mexican restaurant and have dinner and then hang out in his parents’ backyard.  This place was a 50 minute drive for me, but apparently its beautiful up there and I imagined looking at the stars drinking some wine and then leave.

I just got a new car and I was so up for the drive. I show up at his parents’ house, I was dressed pretty casual. Oh, actually – I went directly from work, it was a Friday night, so I had on black pants and a casual top.   When I got there, he was already standing in the front yard, on his phone texting. He looked up and smiled and greeted me as I got out of the car.  Normal enough.

This is where it starts to get weird.  I walk over to him and say hello and he walks past me and says nice car and hops right into the drivers’ seat. I laughed it off and was like no pal. New car – not happening - you move to shot gun.  So, he gets out (still nose in his phone) and walks over to the passenger side and when he hopped in, he slams my car door. Not one of those accidental slams, one of those pissed-off slams.

Deciding not to start the night off with irritation, I start driving making conversation.  He doesn’t say much, he is still on his phone.  So I just stop talking, turn up the radio and ask for directions. Silence.

We pulled up the Mexican place – gorgeous. Out of this world!  We sit down and immediately I am more relaxed. The waiter comes over and I ask for a glass of wine.  He asks for a non-alcoholic beer.  Eventually he puts his phone away. At this point, I was still working in a previous position and my boss was traveling so I knew he might be contacting me for things. 

I set my phone next to me and tell Brett: “ok so I really don’t want to be rude, but if my boss DOES call me, I will need to take it.”  His response to that comment is: “you do realize that I am an alcoholic right?” – I was like noooo?  So then I felt bad for enjoying my red wine.  I could not for the LIFE of me recall him ever mentioning that.

So, I say I am sorry I will get rid of the wine. The waiter, looking at me like I am a cook, takes my glass away (while I am crying rivers inside – because how am I supposed to survive this night sober?)

The conversation was so weird. I tried lightening the mood by shifting gears to talking about saving the world, and travel - Things we had talked about in the past during massages.  But for some reason he was fidgety in his seat and wouldn’t really respond much. Much to my relief my boss calls, I talk to him for two minutes and when I hang up, Brett says: “wow can’t separate you from your phone for a minute hey”

All he kept saying was how he was a recovering alcoholic and he hates that people are so rude to order and drink alcohol in front of him. In between saying what an independent, confident woman I am and that he is happy I make SO much money and drive nice cars and travel the world.  My response was, well I work really hard. I do alot in the world, I try atleast and my money and things don't get to my head. I feel like I live a pretty humble life. 

He kept saying, oh dont apologize. Just admit it. You have it all. FAR from it. But It kept on feeling like an argument, so I just sipped my water - dropping alot of F-Bombs in my head. 

By this point I am so irritated, I just start shoveling my food down without talking.   Then he says, would you like a drink? I was like no thanks, just the check.  On the way back to drop him off, all of a sudden he is the massage therapist Brett again. Laughing and talking. I am like whoa! What?

Can anyone say Bi-polar?

I stop off at his parents’ house and he says come on in, I don’t mind if you have some wine, really I am in a program and I am fine..  My response is no thanks. I decide I want to see this gorgeous house, so I go in and ask for water.   I walk in and the living room is set up with the massage table and low lighting ambiance.  He then says, ok the table is ready whenever you are.

I was like NO thanks. Firstly. I was not in the massage mood, not to mention feeling really awkward by this point and kinda creeped out!  And then out comes 5 cats running toward me, probably knowing I am freaking allergic, they start jumping all over my – black pants full of cat hair.  My eyes got all swollen and my throat started to itch. 

Quickly he says let me show you the view outside. Ok this is the last thing for me – and at this point I am just torturing myself for NO reason. Maybe curiosity, politeness of my inability to just say no to people.

I go outside, and sure enough it is breath taking.  All of a sudden he seems so much more relaxed.   I sit down and look at the stars as he starts telling me how much he has grown as a person.   Just then, his phone rings and he answers it. Chats for about a minute. 

He comes back, sits down next to me not saying a word.  To break this silence and the need to pee started to overwhelm me.  I wanted to use the loo but started by saying: "This is beautiful". Before I finished the “L” in Beautiful, he says, Ok you need to leave.

I am like: Huh? And he is like again you have to leave now.  I asked can I use the loo, he is like year please hurry up.  I gather my stuff and he is hurrying me out the door, and I am like thanks for a nice evening. And he is like yeah. Bye. Doesn’t even walk me to my car – closes the door behind me.

I drive home STUMPED. In fact I just started laughing hysterically in disbelieve at this thing I can only describe as an abortion of a "date"

We had a second date. I kid you not. Story for another time!

Oh before I forget...  here is the photo of my fat body more mortifying than the one before.. UGH!

                   Turning 41

Proved to be worse than turning 40. I have been trying from all angles to make sure physically I stay ME.. and man, the universe said “fuck you!” big time.

However, if any of you truly know me, You know that I do not take these type of insults lying down.. So universe. No – F YOU!!! ;)

I have learnt this past year more than ever. That only God and I are my best friend and only I am my worst enemy.

This might sound really dumb, but the biggest lesson I learned is that I need more sleep. Without it I am just a crazy crack head. 

And it isn’t really that I am not getting sleep. I am not getting enough quality sleep and relaxation.

 So my life lesson to myself is to smoke weed. No kidding. Find ways to relax more! And sleep better. SO  that I need to supplement less.

Oh how life becomes so basic when you get older. Soon, my only worries will be trying not to pee in my pants in public!

God has taught me over the years through his wisdom of allowing us to age:

1.   Teens - You’re vain. It’s useless

2.      20’s and 30’s You’re beautiful – Its useless

3.      40’s not so vain, not so beautiful – Now you know that you should have spent more time working on your emotions, your friendships, your destiny / passions and just having fun in life.

     All that crying in your room being miserable because someone didn't approve of you. Waste of tears and time.  Where are they now?

The thing is, all that really matters is taking care of yourself physically, emotionally and mentally. Taking care of the people you love and enjoy the things you have. All of which can vanish in a moment.

My mom sent me this:

-        Envy is a waste of time

-        Don’t take yourself so seriously

-        Time heals almost everything. Give time a little time

-        Always choose life

-        No one else is in charge of your Happiness but you

God – grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change. Change the one I can. And Wisdom to know that one is me.

Update on life and activities:

April

After my Al Pacino sighting, life again moved at supersonic pace.  

We had a wonderful Easter, had a few charity events that we worked at, free tickets to a basketball game and date weekend bar none. Went out for Teppanaki and the next day for breakfast and bottomless mimosas.

This was also when I started watching “Sons of Anarchy” I have to say – stupid as it may sound this series took me on a very emotional and intense journey.. at the end of the series, I had not only become a potty mouth but fell in love with a biker boy.

It was very sad when it came to an end and I really had bad withdrawals!  OMG what have I become lol  Honestly - I felt thoroughly depressed. 

It is so funny though, because something so trivial like a TV show can teach you so much about life and about yourself. And I really don’t mean in a Hollywood kinda way. I mean in a real way – life lessons.

One of which is this. Family is everything.  And "Family" might be blood but it is also whom you choose to share your life with.

Being a parent is hard. It is so rewarding. I am SO glad and I don't have any regrets choosing not to have children. But the two I inherited are so awesome. And I cannot wait to see what they become one day.

Over Memorial Day weekend

Took the entire family and went to Lake of the Woods.  We stayed in a cabin and every day was just filled with lots of sleep, kayaking, hikes, great food and relaxation. It was truly awesome.

This weekend was a little bitter sweet though. It seemed that it marked a very significant shift in my relationship. We know it all happens at some point.. But somehow it just always sucks when it does. It was like the powdery romance evaporated. I guess in life that needs to happen so you can truly see the person and the picture for what it is. Still a good picture. Just a different feeling.

June 17^th 2016

Then ofcourse my 41^st birthday. I took the day off from work. Firstly this birthday surprised me so much. I received so many gifts from the most unlikely people and it left me pretty speechless. I felt like not only a queen for a day but loved beyond measure. And I realized. No matter I fat I grow (lol) I have incredible people in my life.

It started on the 16^th at work. My co-workers bought me an orchid, a birthday cake and gifts. They sang to me and made a huge fuss. Funny story: I have a South African Co-worker who shares the same birthday – how random is that!

So we sang Happy Birthday to each other in Afrikaans. It was alot of fun!

On my actual birthday, it was a bit dramatic at home, we had to be on a call with attorneys that was unpleasant. But that didn’t ruin my day!  I had a shower, packed an overnight bag and went over to meet my good friend Jody at the Henry for brunch. The Henry is a “to-die-for” fancy place. It reminded me a little of the time I had high Tea with Lindsey in Colorado. Good memories.

It was sweltering hot outside. We drank a few mimosas and I had a delicious lobster salad. Birthday cake and all – we only got done chatting, laughing and having a great time by 2pm.

It was then time for me to Robe up and be pampered. I had a full body scrub / massage / coconut bath / waterfall / sauna / nap etc you name it. Peaceful, soothing. I enjoyed it so much.

After those few hours of relaxation, I headed over to the Fairmont Five Star Hotel where I met my honey and we had a shower, relaxed and I opened my gifts OMG! He got me the best gift ever – Amazon Echo. You know to Tech out my home. I now have to just speak and my whole place is ambient. Lights come on, music comes on it is amazing.

I am such a Tech Geek. I love all my technology gadgets ;)

I also got designer bags. Gift cards for nails, massages, trips.  I got make up and make up brushes. My one good friend at works’ husband made me a stool out of a tree log! I mean just incredible stuff.

I was blown away!  What a fantastic birthday!

My waist has expanded, but so has my people. :) whoooppppy

Now it is time to de-clutter.

Yes, this is actually a picture of my current closet. I threw half of my shelves on the floor in an effort to sort it out. That was 4 days ago.. but I am in the process. It's cathartic if I ever get to it!

out with the OLD and in with the NEW

Here are a few pictures of my birthday, Father's Day and just my wonderful Family:

Which I have finally accepted after 3 years of resistance! 

And last but not least.. Let me overshare. I wouldnt be me - if I didnt.  Remember this?

Well, now it's this:

I should take a better one.. more mortifying that this:

Bleh!!!

A Short Blurb from my Memoir

So This Happened - Chapter One

Once Upon a time for like a Hot Minute.  A long, long time ago …

It was a complicated time in my life as far as love and all that jazz....

September 21^st, 2008.  I was living in Denver.

 The DNC convention had just about wrapped up.  

I met up with my [now] Life Coach whom I had insanely stalked for the better part of my teens.

Very quick Side note:  When I was 15 I went to a church thing where I heard him preach / speak for the first time. He was a wild man. He was jumping around on stage, yelling at the top of his voice and the crowds were going nuts! This was back in South Africa. As I walked out through the throngs of people, this lady started singing a song called: 'all that I am" and I am not sure what happened but something told me in an almost an audible voice: "You are going to be part of his life in the years to come"    

Ok enough freakishness, on with the story:

I honestly thought the sun and all things spiritual shone out of his proverbial butt and I would follow him and search for him anywhere I could find any hint of the man, just to listen, absorb, get a glimpse of greatness.  He was famous and moved around all the Celeb groups around the world. Very, very hard to get to...  After a cleverly devised plan, many years of stalking and stars aligning somehow... we finally became friends and he became my “Life Coach” [and my sanity].

One night, while he was in town, he invited me to join him for dinner.  He was with a group of friends sitting at the bar of a very fancy Seafood Restaurant when I arrived.  He sat there cool and casual as always, waiting for me with a glass of wine. I was nervous.  I was always nervous around him for some reason.  He always smiled at me in a very gallant and protective way.  There were about 8 people.  A few quick introductions went around, I was intimidated, but smiled as I shook everyone’s hand.  I didn’t particularly take note of everyone’s faces in that moment.  The quaint restaurant was very dimly lit.  We all got up as the waiter showed us to our table. Coach turned to me, put one arm around my shoulder and said very nonchalantly, “oh, and this is Jake” he motioned to a guy standing behind him. He was almost as tall as Coach, about 5"11 or so, wearing a baseball hat, baggy blue jeans and grey sweat shirt.

At first I didn’t fully recognize him, but when I realized who it was, the whole experience started moving in slow motion.   It all became surreal. My heart was racing a hundred miles a minute. I was convinced everyone could hear it!  I wondered who I was in this scenario. I looked around our table to memorize everyone’s faces.   I felt silently insignificant. Everyone at the table seemed genuinely interested each other, me included.  I was asked all kinds of questions.  Coach noticed that Jake took a particular interest in me as the night went on and the wine flowed freely among the jovial group.

I started feeling self-conscious and stupid thoughts started flooding my mind, like: "Why did you wear this stupid dress?" - "Gosh, did I put make up on!" LOL

I tried to be cautious with the wine so I don’t get motherless and make an ass out of myself!   I also couldn’t eat. I felt really bad because I had just had a bout of food poisoning and I hadn’t eaten much food except for toast days prior.  Unknowingly, Coach decided to take it upon himself to order for me - oh, yes - HIS favorite fish dish dunked in decadent sauce.  Even the smell started making me feel nausea well up.  I tried my best to pick at it without blowing chunks all over the beautiful, famous people. And, I also didn’t want to be rude.

Side Note #1: Food poisoning seemed to have been a theme with me back then. (Not now, otherwise I wouldn’t be carrying around all this extra podge – ha ha!)  When I was in Shanghai with Moya, we went out to a very fancy dinner with the Famous, incomparable dancer and icon - Jin Xing.

Being very well-known in China, people stopped in droves to stare in awe and take pictures of her. 

  No one dared approach us, Chinese culture is very conservative.  At the restaurant, we sat in a private room and they ordered food for the entire table (Once again, I was negotiating stomach issues). The food was really spicy. I was sweating like a pig, I looked like Ben Stiller in that movie: 

“Along Came Polly” (see pic) when she took him to the Indian restaurant. J  Moya kept asking me if I was ok and offering me more beer with a giggle. But I couldn’t be rude! SO I sucked it up [or rather ate it it up cautiously], enjoyed the banter and made the hotel room loo my best friend for the rest of the night. LOL

Jake sat next to me on the right, a little hunched over, hidden away in his chair.  His hair was unruly as it had been flatly imprinted by the removal of his baseball hat. He sported a cute Five-O’-Clock shadow and looked a little tired. He talked to me with a flirtatious smile on his face enjoying my chirpy knowledge of cars and travel.  His questions seemed endless as if I were the most interesting person on the earth...

His strong, assertive voice seemed to fill the air and tickled parts of my girlishness every time he spoke.  All his comments and comebacks to the table were so intelligent and funny. I felt inferior.  His blue eyes sparkled in the dim restaurant light.  I tried to avoid much eye contact just in case I wound up staring like a blithering idiot.  

It was weird, it felt like we already knew each other.  I could feel him leaning in with a tilted head to my every answer as my face turned bright red.  Every time I spoke, it felt as if the entire table went silent and everyone looked at me.   The introvert in me wanted to die. I could feel my dress getting soaked in sweat.  Kerri, one of Coach’s church friends, commented on my accent.   Amidst the chatter, I was profoundly aware of every part of this night.. and like a movie, my world would pause for a second. 

Well-versed in the art of pretense under pressure, I seemed confident and graceful, which is the exact opposite of what I felt inside. The compliments flowed. It was weird.  When Coach [as he does], perceived that there was a vibe happening across the table, he decided he might take it upon himself to become Mr. Match Maker. Very pleased with himself, he shot a naughty, dimpled smile in my direction with a raised eyebrow looking back and forth at Jake and then back at me – his mischief was met with my “Delise” kind of eye roll.

As the night went on, some people in the restaurant started recognizing the people at our table and it became a little uncomfortable, so we decided to leave.  Coach signed a book and prayed for a little old lady. He was so nonchalant and unwavering in his approach to people. This was his life. It was so natural for him, I admired him so much.   I was glad to leave as I suddenly felt exhausted and overwhelmed.  Even though I soaked in every minute of the experience, part of me just wanted to escape into the peaceful world of civilian anonymity.

We all hugged and muttered pleasantries and goodbyes.  Jake stealthily crept up alongside me and awkwardly mumbled: “Hey, I would really like to continue our conversation”.  With that, he shoved a torn yellow piece of paper into my hand, but before he let go, he added.  “Can I trust you?” His deep, blue eyes were mesmerizing and serious.

Side Note#2: What kind of a question is, “Can I trust you?” I mean who will ever say: “No you can’t trust me”. #dumb

Either way, I just nodded and smiled like a robot zombie. (what the hell is a Robot Zombie anyway?)

I think I said something, I cannot quite remember. His number was scribbled on the crookedly torn yellow-lined piece of paper - which I still keep in my memory box as a keepsake! Lol.  (Highest bidder gets it! Jokes). I drove home in a daze wondering when he had torn the piece of paper, what pen he used, where did the paper come from, where is the rest of it. (brain-full-of-silly-questions).

I was self-consciously driving a very ugly blue Ford Taurus at the time. A company car I reluctantly drove only when I REALLY had to drive somewhere, like up to the mountains.  In Denver I walked everywhere. Living in the heart of the city, a car was a useless commodity.   For my ego sake, I had parked waaaaaaay on the other side of the parking lot.  Coach smiled and embraced me.  He leaned his 6ft tall body  down to my 5"2 frame and leaned towards my ear and whispered how great it was to see me and showered me with compliments about my graciousness and how “cool” I was and then hurried off with the rest of his group.

I could always count on Coach to make me feel like the most important person alive.  I have never “needed” ego boosts, but if I ever felt less than amazing, he sure was the one to go to for a "pick-me-up"

I hurried off to my car avoiding any eye contact with anyone.  As I turned on the ignition, my Blackberry rang. Coach was on the other end. In his usual “Stage” voice he said: “Delise… it is Mr. Coach”. He would always drag out my name like a song (Deliiiiiiisssse) and always call himself: “Mr.” 

He then proceeded to give me a speech that went something like this:

“You know you are amazing and incredible right?  Over all the years that I had known you, I never second guessed having you around me, around my world. I am no ordinary man.  I do not live in an ordinary world and circumstance, so I choose very carefully whom I trust in my circle.  There is a grace about you that makes me feel like I can trust you completely and also trust you around my friends, they, too, are no ordinary people and I feel like you have always understood that, ok?”

I listened for a second and said, “ok, thanks?.  I said it almost as a question.  

Before I could say anything else, there was another voice on the line:

Conversation:

Delise: “Hello?” There was a pause, but I could hear shuffling and voices in the background

Delise: “Coach?” I asked confused

It wasn’t Coach on the line anymore. I heard a throat clearing.

J: “That was a great dinner wasn’t it?”

D: “ yeah ermm” [giggle]

My heart started to pound really loudly

J: “I would really like to see you again. I think you are very interesting”

D: “Thank you.” Sure, what were you thinking?” I hope words actually came out of my mouth, because at the time, it felt like my head was going to explode

I am almost sure I was trying to be cool, but it escaped me entirely.

J: “Erm, well I mean.  Can you meet me at Denver Airport tomorrow, I will text you the time”

D: “ok”

We said a few awkward goodbyes.

I started thinking how the next day was a Monday and I had to work, but I was pretty sure I could come up with a valid excuse to take off for a few hours. My mind raced with thoughts throughout my sleepless night.

[Have you noticed that my brain is an endless abyss of stupidity under pressure!]

Sidenote#3:

The words: “well, I mean” would be said A LOT in my interactions with Jacob.

No text came.

Early that morning, he called.  It must have been around 6am, I was still groggy when his voice, out of breath rattled off, “can you meet me in an hour? My plane leaves the DIA Jet Center then? “.

My inner voice was like NO! Its daylight, I need at LEAST 2 hours to decide what to wear get ready etc.  It takes atleast 30-minutes to drive the Ugly Ford Taurus all the way to DIA from Downtown Denver. {and Park somewhere no one will see me!}  “Yes, ofcourse” I chirped instead.  Those Denver days, I had a sexy closet to die for and a body to die for too - so, looking hot in a minute was pretty effortless. ;)

The traffic was terrible and I was sweating from the stress.  As I got there hurriedly, about 10 minutes late.  I walked into the FBO and saw him leaning against the wall wearing a dark blue t-shirt and jeans, he looked remarkably taller and different in the daylight.  His hair was all ruffled and unruly like he had just woken up.  He was on his phone talking softly and smiled broadly when he saw me.

He motioned for me to come to him, and like a robot zombie [again with the zombies!] summoned by its master I obediently walked toward him, smiling.  My heart was pounding so hard, I was worried I would die of a heart attack right there. I could just see the news headlines now:

“Commoner drops down dead at a Denver Airport in the presence of Celebrity”

Now, I am thinking that sounds like a great blurb for my tombstone LOL

" Here lies Delise Moore - dropped down dead, either from stupidity or heart failure caused my stupidity"

Wondering if anyone could see the sweat which was now dribbling from my armpits down my sides.  I chose to wear these light blue jeans, a grey shirt and a cute waist coat. Might sound basic, but I knew these jeans made me look great, slim and tall and the shirt was sexy but also said "I am conservative and sophisticated and hot without effort".  I did throw on a killer pair of heels, too!  

He hung up the phone and put his arm around me in a huge embrace. Good thing I wore 4 inch heels, he seemed so tall all of a sudden. I returned his hug and was surprised at how muscular he felt, compared to how slender he appears. We talked for a few minutes about dinner and plans for the day, like old friends catching up.  He kept touching my hand as he spoke.  He seemed a little awkward. He told me he felt connected to me.  He was so jovial, laughing and smiling the entire time.  He complimented me in ways I had never been complimented before. It was intense. The precursor for every sentence was: “Well, erm” or “you know”…

As he began looking through his phone for his schedule, His ‘Assistant’ [or whoever that guy was]  came over with a huge folder, huffing and frowning, looking very stressed, “The pilot is ready, we are already half an hour late for the meeting in New York, shall I call and postpone?”    Jake got up and they talked for a minute.

He then mid-sentence turned around to face me and threw and almost violent hug my way. He gave me an innocent kiss on the cheek before scurrying away. “I will call later” he yelled as he scurried off and then he turned back to me and flashed me the most amazing smile and waved like a geeky idiot. I waved back.. like a geeky idiot...

AND I didn’t wake up! It was real.

I had just about lost faith in the whole experience as a whole week went by without a call.

 Then I left for Singapore......